Judgements, Preferences, Choices

I have always known that I am "different" at a young age of 6. I have also known since I was young that I am very sensitive. Judgement was a delicate aspect of life from my perspecitive ofthen I feared being judged and I feared to judge anyone. Whatever that emotions and thoughts I had at a younger age was probably my choice before I was born. Whether judgements, being sensitive, being different and being homosexual are all interrelated or not remains a mystery.

Is this being esoteric or bull shit?

I have always thought that Judgement was the judgement of the bad. I have always programmed that doing bad does not make you go to heaven. This teaching has always been fear based and this kind of programming did not do any good at all.

Identification of good is a judgement as well. In my opinion, the judging what is good is judging what is bad as well. For without the differences and contrasts, you can't differentiate what is black and white, day and night, dark and light and the list goes on. You cannot judge what is good when you dont know what is not bad.

I do not condone doing bad things especially criminally minded ones. The reality is life reality presents you with heaps of contrasts of the good and bad. In my opinon, both exists for a reason.

We fear judging people because truth hurts. But does the truth really set you free? I reckon judgements is only to be used in the aid of making a choice and having preferences. If kept yourself, you are in the okay side. However if you choose judgement only to hurt people, then I guess you are very much in trouble.

Sometimes, negative situations worked to my advantage. More than often it was an opportunity in disguise. More than often I stay relaxed when I encounter one and I have otugrown panic reactions when one comes.

Obama was once said..he does not gets too high when he is high and he does not go too low when he is low. I guess this is the best management of positivity and negativity in all aspects of life. That is, you take things one at a time and don't react violently or screem & jump over positive and joyful momements.

The gay culture is an odd example of judgements. Gay men hated so much to be judged and discriminated to an extent they go and fight their rights. However, within their circles there are sub-judgements. Examples of which I hear: cheap walking gay chopsticks (asians), black gay men, troubled closeted men. Labels, labels, labels wether good or bad is a judgement.

I am guilty of passing on judgements myself but fear it. But over the years, I have used judgements just to make my own choice or preferences.